If I could say I have been feeling discouraged this week, that would probably be an understatement. I've felt the sting of discouragement hitting me almost every day this week. Mid-terms were stressful, getting all my assignments in on time was stressful, missing one and seeing a big old "0" come up was stressful, and work was super busy! As I was sitting here thinking about "why am I putting myself through all of this" tonight, I was suddenly overcome with emotion. I saw one of my grades go from an "A" to a "B" in an instant because I missed an assignment and my heart sank. I was basing all of my worth and my effort on seeing that A and was becoming more focused on that than the work.
As I prayed for some peace to comfort me tonight, I was more or less chastised. And it hit me hard. The question that came to my mind was, "Who are you doing this for anyway?" Immediately...without hesitation, I knew I was thinking the wrong things. I knew I was letting myself become discouraged instead of moving forward and just doing the best I can and giving it my best shot. Because ultimately, what I am trying to do is to learn how to put all of this work together...not get an "A" so that I can brag about it. Oh how I have been humbled this evening.
Once I put myself back on the right track, I got back on my computer and back to work, and sailed right on through my assignments. I know that once I had put my heart back in the right place, and humbly asked for guidance, I was blessed with His loving support.
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